Alone
by KareBear1965
Summary: Being abandoned by her mom at ten she always had this fear of being alone. With Charlie's death, she finds herself alone. Can Jasper get her to open up and accept him in her life?
1. Chapter 1

I was ten when I moved in with my dad, the Chief of Police for Forks, Washington. My mom had always been a flake and when she disappeared for more than a week, I called my dad crying. I was scared of being alone.

More than once over the years there were periods of time that I didn't see my mom, because of the odd hours that she worked, but I could always tell that she had been home. This time all my cups were still in the sink as were the knives I used to make my own sandwiches.

My dad was on the next flight to Arizona to get me. It took my mom two weeks to call him in a panic, not knowing where I was, and if I was safe. It turned out that mom had met a new guy, and they went on a vacation. Dad was livid to say the least and took mom to court to make sure she could never do that to me again.

I liked living with dad. I made my first real friend, Mary Alice Whitlock. She was the youngest of the Whitlock brood. Peter, the oldest, lived in Seattle with his wife Charlotte. He was some sort of engineer, while Charlotte was a stay at home mom of their two kids. Then there were the twins, Rosalie and Jasper.

Rosalie, and her husband Emmett McCarty, lived locally and ran a custom auto shop in Port Angeles, while Jasper became an officer in the Army after attending West Point. They all treated me like family, in fact, Lillian Whitlock, their mom, had taken it upon herself to make sure I never felt alone or abandoned again.

Rose even made sure that when Lillian couldn't watch me, she would. Just like my mom, Rose called me an old soul. Both Lillian and Rose taught me how to cook, and by the time I was thirteen, I was cooking meals for Charlie and I.

I was treated much like Alice when I was over at the Whitlocks. Peter and Char both deemed me their little sister. Rose treated me much like she did Alice, but also like a friend. Jasper, who wasn't around much because of his chosen career, treated me like I was special.

When he was at home on leave, he would spend time with just me. At first, this made my dad uncomfortable because of the fact that he was eighteen years older and unmarried.

By the time Alice and I were in high school, I knew for sure that I wanted to be with Jasper. I kept this to myself, and he stared in my dreams nightly. Alice started dating Edward Cullen, the son of the local Chief of Staff at the hospital.

Alice always asked me why I wasn't accepting invites to dates or dances from the guys in our class. I always told her that I wasn't interested in any of them and that when the right guy comes into my life, I'll gladly date and see where it goes. She laughed and said that I sounded much like Jasper, for he said he would never marry until he meets his soulmate.

High school came and went. Alice went to a school back east, so she could be close to Edward. Being the Chief's daughter, we didn't have much money, so it was local schools for me. As time went on the calls and emails from Alice came less and less.

The rest of the Whitlock's, along with the Cullen's, also moved back east and once again, I was alone except for my dad.

The day after I graduated college with my degree in English, with my teacher's certification; I got the call that Charlie had been shot on a routine traffic stop.

I called Alice needing a friend. She didn't answer, so I sent a text to all my contacts, which were the Whitlocks and Cullens, minus Jasper. I didn't have a contact for Jasper because he never knew if he was going to be state side or overseas, besides feeling that it's wrong for him to have the number of his sister's friend.

For the first time since I was ten, I felt so alone. It had been six hours, since I sent the text. It's been five hours, since I sent a second one to Rose. I kept checking my phone to make sure it hadn't died. Here, I'm twenty-two years old, and I have no one to sit with me, while I wait to find out if my dad makes it or not.

I couldn't help but look back at the past as I sat waiting. When I first came to Forks, I felt so loved and wanted, but slowly over the past four years, that feeling of being alone and abandoned has inadvertently crept back.

Finally, the doctor came to tell me the news. The news, which my gut had been telling me I would hear for the past half an hour. Dad didn't make it. I sent a quick text out to all my contacts, as I slowly walked out of the hospital numb from the news. Now, feeling even more alone than ever.

I'm not sure how I got home with all the tears, which were falling like torrential rain. I don't remember even making it to my room. I cried and slept, cried some more. I never moved from my spot, unless I needed to use the bathroom. I'm not sure, how long I had been there like that until Deputy Marks came looking for me.

He told me it had been two days, and I haven't been answering the door or the house phone. He used the spare key that Charlie had hidden for emergencies, deciding that her dad would agree this was one. He told me that Reverend Weber has been working on getting everything ready for Charlie's funeral and would gladly help me get all of his affairs in order.

I sent out one last text to all my contacts. **Charlie's dead I'm all alone. **

I showered, fixed something to eat since the rumble in my tummy reminded me that I was hungry, and didn't recall if I had eaten over the past two days. Once the kitchen was cleaned, I called Reverend Weber.

After the funeral, I became even more withdrawn. With Deputy Marks help, I cleaned out Charlie's office. Reverend Weber held true to his words and took care of calling the insurance company, along with the bank.

It was nice to know that the house was fully paid for and Charlie already had it set up to be transferred into my name upon his death. After all of Charlie's affairs were taken care of, I closed myself off from the world except to do the minimal stuff needed to survive. Here, I sit with a teacher's certificate, but have no desire to be around people. It's been two months, and I've never heard anything from the Whitlocks or Cullens. How could I have been so wrong to think that they were like family? They had abandoned me too, when I needed them the most.

This was worse than when I was ten and mom had abandoned me for some guy. I had no clue on how to function or move forward. I just went through the motions. When I was home, I never did anything other than sit in the rocking chair in my room, silent tears cascading down my sunken cheeks. With my will to live slowly dwindling, no hope in sight, hanging on was getting harder and harder.

Over the next six months, I would hear the local rumors when I went into Thriftway to get my groceries. It seems that Deputy Marks didn't want the job of Chief, so they were looking outside of the state for a replacement.

I know that from time to time, Deputy Marks and Reverend Weber would come and check on me, but I would never answer the door no matter how persistent, or long they knocked. I would tell them through the door, I was fine so that Deputy Marks wouldn't break the door down now that I had removed the hidden key from its resting place.

As the anniversary of Charlie's death rolled around, once again heard rumors. This time, what I would hear was that the new chief sure grew up to be a _caring man and loved his country_. The way they all talked it was, as if he had grown up here. I swear that I heard just a few weeks back that he was coming to us from Texas. _Rumors_, who knew what to believe and what to take with a grain of salt?

I wasn't prepared for seeing the only guy; I've ever held a crush on. As I walked out of Thriftway, there he was, standing in his chiefs' uniform leaning against the side of my truck. Even with the frown on his face, my heart skipped a beat as our eyes met.

"Isabella, Charlie would be rolling over in his grave if he knew you were shutting out the world," he said as I pushed my cart to the back of the truck, so I could place the bags in there, quickly averting my eyes as to not show any emotion. However, the only emotion left was despondence.

"What's it to you?" I questioned sounding cold and hurt.

He took the bags out of my hands carefully placing them in the bed of the truck.

"I once promised Charlie that I would look after you and never hurt you. How can I look after someone who has shut themselves away from the world, except to pick up a few groceries here and there?" He said, concern laced his southern drawl.

"Where were you when Charlie died, where were any of the people I thought of as my family? Nobody called; nobody sent a card or showed up for his funeral. You all left me alone, so go to hell," I shouted as I shoved the cart into the collection bin.

I walked past him, climbed into the truck, backed out leaving him standing there staring after me. I drove home not even bothering to get my food. I ran up the walkway fumbling as I unlocked the door, shutting it as well as relocking it before I slumped down and cried. How dare he say that he made a promise to look after me? Where was everybody when I needed him or her the most? Promises meant nothing if not kept.

All the hurt and anger that I'd built up over this past year came flooding out. I cried, holding my legs close to my body. I found myself rocking back and forth, and each time my back would hit the door; I would let my head hit also.

I'm not sure, how long I sat there like this, when the banging and shouting started.

"Isabella open this door, I won't let you shut me out; I'll stay out here until you let me in," I heard repeatedly.

I slowly stood; turned, unlocked the door, opened it and threw myself into his arms.

"Just tell me why?" I begged as fresh tears came down.

I felt him pick me up and walk over to the couch.

"Darlin', I don't know about the rest of the family. I've not talked to anyone in a few years. I only heard of Charlie's death when I saw the posting for the new chief. I applied because I knew I couldn't stay away any longer. I'm here and I'm not going anywhere," he explained while simultaneously rubbing my back.

"Why have, the rest never called? I texted them. I also left voicemail?" I questioned him again, the tears spilling again.

"I can't answer that," he said kissing the top of my head as he wiped the tears away, "What I can answer is that you've always been so special to me. You are a part of me, the part that makes me whole," he said causing me to look at him with raised eyebrows.

I just stared not understanding what he was saying.

"Yes, Darlin'. I've known since the first time we meet that, you were it for me, but you were so young. Charlie knew how I felt about you. He saw the way I looked at you, so we talked and came to an _understanding_. He asked me to make sure that you were safe and taken care of if anything ever happened to him. I failed by not checking up on you or him these past few years. For that, I'm sorry; I should have been here for you. I only hope that you can forgive me, and give me a chance to make it right," he declared placing a tender kiss on my lips.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

I couldn't believe my ears; he was saying that I was his soul mate, and that he's been waiting for me to grow up. He said Charlie knew about how he felt about me. I don't give a damn about any of this; I've been alone for a year.

I needed to be away from him. I can't let him in that easily. He left like all the others. I've not seen him or talked to him in years. If he cared so much about me, he would have called, email, or even texted me.

I pushed myself away from his chest making him release his hold on me. I stood and walked into the kitchen.

"I think you need to leave, if you think you can waltz right back into my life that easily you're wrong. You all knew about my abandonment issues, yet each and every one of you abandoned me just like I was nothing," I state with my back turned to him, so he couldn't see how much telling him to leave hurt.

"Isabella, I'll leave for now, but trust me when I say it won't be for good. I've loved you since you were ten years old. I've never had a serious relationship, because it's always been you. I'm almost forty-one, and I'll wait for the rest of my days, if that is what it takes to make you see I'll never leave you again," he responded to my outburst.

I could hear him walk to the door. Once he left, I broke down again. I don't know if I can ever forgive him for what he and his family have done to me. They broke me worse than what my own mother did; when I needed family or even just a friend none of them where there for me.

I pulled myself together and then I went out and got my bags from the back of the truck. I decided that I would just do my best to live my life day to day like I had this past year. I've gotten used to being alone and that is what I want to continue.

After putting everything away, I cooked my dinner, before retiring to my room. I heard the house phone ring. I just let it ring. Later as I lay down to go to sleep, I heard the phone once again. He will slowly learn I don't have a need for him.

He didn't need me and wasn't there when I needed him or anyone at all. My sleep was much like it was each night since Charlie's death; I woke in the middle of the night crying feeling so alone and empty.

I got up and made myself a cup of tea, which I sweetened with honey. As I drank my tea, I thought over all that had happened the day before and it just made it hurt all that much more. As I sat there, I saw the lights of a vehicle go by.

That's weird this is Forks, and the only person out at this time of the night is the Chief or one of his deputies. A few moments later, I saw the lights again, this time they slowly passed. I knew it then that it was Jasper. He was making sure everything was alright here, but it's not and it never will be.

I have learned that I don't need anyone in my life. I can do whatever I want and being alone is what I want. I know that, deep down all this is not what I want, but I'm scared to let anyone in, because I'm scared, they will leave me and it would kill me to be left alone again.

I finished up my cup of tea, turned off the lights, and went back up to bed. I rolled over and the sun was shining brightly through the window. I looked at the clock, and it was already noon. How did I sleep this late? I'm normally up no later than six in the morning.

I showered before going downstairs to fix something to eat. I knew the mail should have come by now so I opened the door to go collect it, there sitting on my porch was a basket of wild flowers. On the handle of the basket was an Angel and in the center of the flowers there were some flowers made into the shape of a dog. They had even pasted eyes onto the flowers.

I looked at it once and I sat it on the table by the front door to continue to go and collect the mail. I found myself drawn to the basket of flowers and this time when I looked at them, I could see a card placed inside the arrangement.

I pulled out the card and it simply said: An Angel for my Angel.

The thought that went through my mind made me cry. As I sat the basket back down, just holding the card, I told myself hell will have to freeze over before I let him in.

For once, I found myself not going upstairs to sit in my rocker. I busied myself around downstairs cleaning and every time I walked by the basket, I found myself reaching out and touching the little angel.

As the day came to an end, I picked up the basket and carried it up the stairs with me. I placed it on top of my dresser, so it would be the first thing I saw as I woke up.

For the first time in over a year, I didn't wake in the middle of the night crying. I felt protected. I still felt alone, but knew I now had someone watching over me. As I woke up the next day, I realized that I had slept in again; it had to be almost noon. The first thing I did was check the mail, since I know for sure that it was delivered for the day. Opening the door once again sitting on the porch was a flower arrangement, this one in a watering can. As I picked it up, I gasped when I saw the butterfly barrette that I had thought was lost since I was twelve.

While taking the barrette out of the arrangement, I saw a card. I picked it up and read:

**With doe like eyes, she looks upon the world around her.**

**The sadness is always there.**

**The smiles that never reach her eyes.**

**She feels alone, even though she is not.**

**What will it take to brighten those doe like eyes of hers?**

**What will it take to make the sadness go away?**

**What will it take to make those smiles include her eyes?**

**Angels watch over her, even though she does not know,**

**From afar, he watches and waits**

What is he doing? Does he think all this will make me let him in? How dare, he hold on to my barrette. It was the first gift I got after moving here. I cried for hours when I lost it. Holding the card with the poem along with the barrette, I cried over everything I had lost again.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: The more I think about this story I see it as a short one. It will only have two more regular chaptes and then an epilogue. After all it's about her being alone and coming to terms with it.**

Chapter 3

Every day for the past month, I've gotten flowers, with a card from him. He's not going to break me into giving in and talking to him. Why should I let him in? Why can't he just leave me alone like I want to be? I hate this, so much; part of my brain says to forgive him that he really cares, but part of my brain goes, where was he when I needed him the most to help me through Charlie's death?

Does he know why his family abandoned me? More and more questions keep popping up in my head. I needed answers and talking to him is going to be the only way to get any of them. Darn I am going to have to give in even if I don't want to. I will let him in and then once my questions are answered, he is out the door!

It took everything I had inside me to call him and invite him to dinner. I picked up one of the many cards on which he's written his number and called it. My call went straight to voicemail. Oh, bother why should I leave a message? I hung up and found myself calling five minutes later.

"Jasper, this is Bella Swan, I thought it might be good to have dinner with you. Just let me know which day is best for you," I hung up as my voice got weaker and weaker, I didn't want him to hear me cry over the phone.

I can't deny it I'm lonely for company. I hate being so alone, but everyone I thought cared about me doesn't really care. I needed answers and answers are what I was going to get. I sat and cried for I'm not sure how long.

I finally picked myself up off the couch to get something to eat it might settle my stomach, which was turning. I ate and then went to take a nap, something I do every day. When you're alone, there's not much to do.

I'd just gotten up from my nap and made it to the kitchen to fix something for dinner, when the phone rang. The sound startled me since Deputy Marks stopped calling to check on me months ago.

I answered knowing it could only be one person. After all I called him and invited him to dinner.

"Hello," I said as I picked up the phone my voice was shaking, as was my whole body.

"Isabella, sorry I didn't return your call earlier, but I've been in court all day. I would love to come to dinner anytime, which day is best for you," his voice was so calm; it calmed the shaking in my body.

"I'm just starting dinner now and I always cook way too much, so if you want to come tonight that would be nice," I said not knowing where those words had come from.

"I'll be there in thirty minutes, if that is alright with you?"

"Yes, that would be nice see you in thirty," I answered and hung up before he could say any more.

Why had I answered the phone? Why had I invited him over to dinner? Oh, yeah I want answers and he's the only one who can give them to me.

I went back into the kitchen to work on dinner.

I'd just finished up with the noodles when the knock came. I answered the door, and just stood there staring at him. He was dressed in jeans, cowboy boots, and a tight fitting black t-shirt. I could see all his muscles in his upper body. Damn he was a fine looking man. I felt myself blush, before I could get the courage to ask him in.

"Dinner is ready, so go ahead and take a seat at the kitchen table and I'll dish up our meal."

I turned and walked into the kitchen to dish up the noodles and put stroganoff on top. It was a simple meal, but tasty in my book. As I sat the plate down in front of him, he said, "Smells great, bet it taste as good as it smells."

"Let's get right to the point of me asking you over here. Do you know why your family and the Cullen's have abandoned me?"

"I've talked with my parents and mom says you're not a child any more and need to grow up and learn to handle what life throws at you. I told her that was bullshit. I asked her if the Cullens felt the same way and she said of course. I asked why Alice who's supposed to be your best friend didn't even send a card and mom's answer was she was on her honeymoon and guessed she forgot all about it when she returned. This only got me upset as to how the hell did I not even get invited to my own sister's wedding as well as the person who she claimed as best friend. I hung up and haven't talked to them since! That was the day after you kicked me out of the house after holding you while you cried in my arms."

I just sat there and stared at him for the longest time not knowing what to say.

"So, I'm a grown up and need to learn to handle what life throws at me? Alice got married to Edward I assume and didn't invite me.? Wow, I must really rate as a best friend. We always talked about being each other's Maid of Honor, wonder who got that job?" I was fighting the tears, so I pushed back my seat and stood and ran to the bathroom. I didn't want to show how hurt I really was.

I knew running showed it just as much as my tears in the end as no sooner had I slid down the back of the door did he start knocking on it.

"Isabella, please stop shutting me out. I know I was wrong for not staying in contact with you or your dad once you went to college, but shit I had no clue my family or the Cullens would abandon you as they did. I thought , once you were out of college and Alice and Edward married, we would met again at the wedding and I would tell you how I felt about you. I've never dreamed all this would go so wrong. I've loved you since you were nine and I first met you in my parents' kitchen helping mom and Alice make cookies. I've always know you were it for me. I just needed to wait until you became an adult to let you know. I prayed that our eighteen-year age difference wouldn't bother you. God, Isabella I would do anything to set this right."

I slowly stood, turned, and opened the door, threw my arms around him, and just let all the tears and anger escape as he held me close.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Jasper's POV

I was holding her tightly to my chest not wanting to let her go. I knew I was part of those who hurt her by not being here when her dad had died. The last time I'd talk to Charlie was about seven months before he had died. He'd told me everything was going good, and it looked like Bella was going to try for her Master's in Education before looking for a job. This told me it would be at least two more years before I could declare myself to her.

I didn't want to interrupt her education, by being a distraction. When I told her just how much she means to me, I'd wanted us to be able to start a life together and not have to worry about our future.

I'd pictured so many times over the years Bella's stomach rounded with our child growing inside her. Holding her as she cried right now reminding me how I failed Charlie in looking after her. I never thought he would die, to me he was invincible. Being an Officer in the Army in charge of a Battalion of MPs I've seen what drunks or someone strung out on drugs can do. It takes seconds for them to get the upper hand and end someone's life.

Getting out of the Army and being a small town sheriff in Texas, was the stepping-stone. I knew from the time I was a teen I would go in the Army and then become a police officer like Charlie, I'd always looked up to him.

Charlie had helped me with my application to West Point and he was so proud when I got in. In some ways, he'd always seen me like a son. I hated myself for letting my new life as that small town sheriff get in my way of keeping in contract with him.

It kills me to know how alone Bella was. It kills me that I didn't get to say my goodbyes to Charlie. I would have liked to have been at his funeral, to talk about how I admired him and so wanted to be like him when I grew up, and how he helped me and encouraged me during are phone conversations over the years.

I remember calling him the first time one of my MPs had been killed. I remember the time he cornered me about the way I looked at Bella. Me telling him that I loved her and dreamed of spending my life with her. He almost hit me and it shocked me when he didn't. He just told me to keep my distance until she was of age to make that choice.

I screwed up by not being here for her. I would totally understand if she never forgives me. My excuse maybe not as bad as those of my parents and sisters, or the Cullens, but still you don't turn your back on those you consider family. As far as I was concern, I no longer had family outside of Bella if she will have me.

As Bella started to quiet her crying I found myself rubbing her back and kissing the top of her head. I whispered to her how much I loved her and if she would let me in and forgive me I would never let her be alone again.

I wanted her so bad even thought this really wasn't the time or place for that my body still reacted to having her so close. In the past it was all just dreams of holding her and loving her that got me hard this. This was only the second time, being close to her like this, and just like the last time it took my body no time at all to get hard.

Last time was just a few weeks ago, when she cried on my shoulder then proceeded to kick me out of her house. That time she only had her head on my shoulder, so I knew she didn't feel it, this time I wondered could she feel the way my body was reacting towards hers?

Hell I didn't even know if she dated while in college, Charlie never said one way or the other. The few time I asked he would change the subject on me. If she would forgive me I wanted to show her just how I'd take care of her not just her physical needs, but emotional needs also.

I could feel her body start to slump down as her emotions started to drag her down, I picked her up and carried her into her room. I was shocked to see that she was still using the bed she had since she was nine. I sat down on it, laid back pulling her on top of me as I did so.

It just felt so good to hold her like this. Soon I could tell she was asleep. There was no way I was going to leave her, plus I was enjoying being this close to her, dinner was soon totally forgotten.

I thought over the past couple of years as to why my calls to Charlie had gotten farther and farther apart. When I got out of the Army and took the job in Midland, Texas, I meet Peter and his wife Charlotte, who soon became like family to me and still are. I call them more often then I'd called Charlie that last year of his life.

Peter understood why I came here and backed me, in fact he kicked me out the door telling me not to worry he would sell my house for me. Thoughts of Bella had never been far from my mind and get a little alcohol in me and she was all I'd talk about.

I knew Peter and Charlotte both would love Bella if I could get them to come here and meet her.

I was so deep in thought I didn't feel Bella stir until I heard her say, "I've loved you since I was nine. It hurt so much when not even you showed up at dad's funeral. I hated you as much as I hated them all for pushing me out of your life. Forgiving you won't be easy, but I understand you made a promise to dad that you would keep your distance until he felt I was ready." In a whisper she added "Jasper I'm ready."

My heart and brain were doing cartwheels and back flips as well as giving that internal high-five. I kissed the top of her head before saying, "Are you sure? I don't want you to feel pressured. I've loved you just as long and I'll do what ever it takes to earn your forgiveness…"

I was going to say a few more things when Bella pulled back, turned her head looked at me and said, "Shut-up and kiss me."


	5. Epilogue part 1

**A/N: You know I don't write these very often and I'm only writing this one to let you know there is a second part coming to the epilogue, which will jump a head five years and it will be through Jaspers pov.**

Epilogue part one

Five years later,

I can't believe it's been five years since I let Jasper back into my life. I gave him my heart, my soul, and my virginity all in one night. The following morning we drove over to Idaho and got married, in a small chapel just outside of Post Falls.

He made me feel so loved and wanted, I couldn't stop smiling. We talked about how we would handle the families if they ever came around. We talked about starting a family of our own, which came sooner than either of us really expected; since it turned out I got pregnant my very first time.

We'd also talked about how I should go back to school to get my master's in education so I could teach at the high school and not at the grade school. I think I'm so much better at teaching older students because of my love for literature, as that was truly where my heart is.

Three days after we were married, I signed up for my fall classes, and ran by the doctors to get on some form of birth control, since both Jasper and I wanted to wait until I'd finish college. Since we'd been having unprotected sex for the past few days the doctor felt I should have a blood test done to ensure I wasn't pregnant, then he went ahead and did my physical. We talked about all the different types of birth control and decided that if the blood work didn't show I was pregnant, I would come back the following day to get my shot.

I went home and waited three hours for his call. I was so nervous. When the call came in I just sat down and cried. What was I going to do now? I'd just ruined all our plans. I was still crying sitting on the floor when Jasper came home.

He held me as I cried and told him I screwed up all our plans. He kissed me and said we'd just have to adjust. He told me how much he loved me and did already love the child that was growing inside me.

My pregnancy seemed to drag on, as I was sick almost all the way to the end. I resented the baby for ruining my life, but that all went out the window the moment I held JW as we ended up calling him short for Jasper Whitlock the second. I learned at that time Jasper didn't have a middle name.

He's just a miniature version of his dad.

When JW was four months old, I went to Seattle to sign up for my classes and to check out the daycare centers close to the college. I walked into one and was shocked to see Rosalie. I decided to play nice and see what she had to say for herself. I mean we had not heard one single word from any of his family and I very much doubted they even knew Jasper and I were married.

I was right the first words she said when she recognized me was "Mom and Esme will be so please to know you really did move on. Don't know why we put up with your sorry, pitiful act for as long as we did."

I was proud of myself for not crying. I just politely told her she could go to hell and would never get to know her nephew. I turned and walked out, walked to my car drove back home, pulled up to the police station and informed Jasper what Rosalie had said as well as what I had said.

He kissed me, told me I did the right thing. That night he got the first call from his mom. I'd never heard him so angry before. In the end, he told his mom to never call him again and that she wasn't the person he thought her to be. He also informed her that JW and I were the only family he'd ever need.

Well that wasn't really true because I went off the shot just three months shy of graduating with my Master's in American as well as English literature. It didn't take us long to have Natalie Maria Whitlock. She has his steal blue eyes, but everything else about her was me.

Even though tomorrow is our actual anniversary we've always celebrated it the night before, the night I finally admitted I didn't have to be alone, I had him to love me. Tonight was going to be special in more ways than one; with both children napping I wrapped his present carefully.

I hadn't been feeling well over the past couple of weeks. I don't know why it hadn't occurred to me what was going on, but I just believed it was the stress of finals. It being my first year teaching and I had a class of each grade, so I had to prepare four different tests. It was my new best friend Angela who convinced me what was really going on. I guess she noticed a few things, which I hadn't.

I was blown away just a few days before when Ang took me to the doctor on our lunch break. She was right, I'm pregnant and this time with twins. Over the past, few weeks I've ran my finger over the picture at least a thousand times if not more.

I wonder what they will look like are they male or female or one of each as the doctor explained they are fraternal. I know Jasper will be happy. He did say he wanted a big family. I told him I would give him as many children as he wanted.

I never could grow tired of my husband. I never knew I could love any one as fierce as I do him. It's a big plus that he's so damn sexy. All the women in town still flirt with him even though they know he only has eyes for me. Just thinking about him makes my hot and wet.

I ran my hand over my still flat stomach as I walked down the stairs, to start dinner. I knew JW and Nat would be up from their naps soon. This house just won't be big enough for all of us. I looked around and tears started to flow. I've lived in this house most of my life. I don't want to live any where else.

I sat down on the bottom step as I started to shake. I'm not sure how long I cried. I didn't even hear JW wake up, I just felt his arms wrap around my neck, as he said, "Mommy why are you crying?"

"Mommies happy and sad at the same time baby," I said.

Nat joined us crawling up on my lap. I knew then that everything would work out. I have the love of a good man and two beautiful children and two more that will make themselves known before long.

"Cars mommy Cars," Nat said pulling my hair.

For just being eighteen months old Nat enjoys the movie Cars and can watch it over and over. I slowly rose off the step with Nat in my arms and walked into the living room, sat Nat in her daddy's chair, since it's her favorite place to sit and watch movies. I then placed the movie in the DVD player turn on the TV, so Nat could watch her movie, while I went into the kitchen to make dinner.

This being a special night I was making one of Jasper's favorite meals Chicken Fried Steak, Mashed potatoes, corn on the cob, and homemade gravy. Living in Texas, he learned to love many Southern foods, so I learned to cook them all. I've also learned to enjoy them.

As I started to peel the potatoes I remember the first time I meet his best friend Peter and his wife Charlotte, who is the person who taught me how to cook all the Southern dishes Jasper loves. They are great people and are the closest thing we have to family.

In fact that will be Jasper's second present. Char called today and told me Peter got a job as Sheriff of Port Angeles, so they will be moving out this way in a few weeks. Char called knowing what this day was and thought it would bring Jasper even more joy on this day.

It will be good to have them so close. Peter and Jasper met at West Point, so they've been best friends for over thirty years. With Angela and Char, I never feel like I'm a temporary friend. I know our friendship will last us the rest of our lives.

I was just plating the Chicken Fried Steak, when I heard the front door open and Nat jumping off the chair, screaming daddy, daddy. She was truly a daddy's little girl if there ever was one. As I sat the plate down on the table, I could hear her giggles.

Hearing them made me smile, feeling loved.

"Go finish your movie sweetness and I'll say hi to your mommy," I heard Jasper say as I finished plating the corn.

"I swear you get more beautiful as each days passes and right now you're so radiant," he said as he placed his arms around me and kissed the side of my neck.

I push back into him needing, wanting to feel all of him.

"Keep doing that woman and I'll take you right here in front of your kids," he growled.

I felt my skin get hot and a pool of wetness hit my panties. The things this man does to my body, with just his words.

"Lets eat, bath the kids, and then you can have your wicked ways with me," I whispered trying to not giggle.

I got a nip on the neck then he was gone.

"Kids wash up for dinner," I heard him say.

Over dinner, Jasper asked how our day was and was I enjoying the start of my summer break. I told him with two kids constantly on the move my summer break wasn't going to be long enough. I love my kids dearly, but their energy level seems to never stop and it's harder and harder to get them to take naps.

We all laughed when Nat dropped her steak on the floor and started crying. That girl loves steak cooked any way, and even with more on her plate, each bite size piece was needed. She eats with a spoon and her hands, which I don't mind since she'll be taking her bath, then one more movie and then bed.

Jasper cleaned up the dinner dishes as I bathed Nat and then got the tub ready for JW. He felt he was a big boy and didn't need mommy to bath him any more, so I just fill the tub let him climb in and then leave just standing outside the door for a few moments then Jasper always says, he needs to pee and goes in and makes sure JW is alright and cleans himself.

As soon as both kids were bathed we sat down to watch a Disney movie, I really didn't pay attention to it, so I can't tell you what one Jasper put in. I spent my time watching him with his kids. He's such a great dad. You can see all his love in his eyes as he talks with him and acts out the movie to make them giggle.

At least meeting him was a good part of coming to Forks as a child; it still hurts even after all this time to learn his family as well as the Cullens only befriended me out of pity for what had happened to me. I'm thankful that Jasper's love for me means more to him then his own family.

I came back to earth as Jasper picked up a half asleep Nat and told JW, "Off to bed with you."

I followed them up the stairs, first kissed JW and told him to have sweet dreams then kissed Nat and told her the same. I hated that the two of them had to share a room, but this house only has the two bedrooms, just one more point to it being way too small for all of us.

Jasper and I walked back downstairs hand in hand. It was now time to give him his presents, but which to give him first.

As we rounded the bottom step to go into the living room I saw the picture of Char and Peter, with their three kids and knew that was the news I was to share first.

His eyes light up with such joy when I told him, he kissed me, igniting that flame inside me. I then handed him the little box I've had sat on the table earlier in the night. "We said we weren't getting each other presents this year," he said with amusement in both his eyes and voice.

"I didn't spend any money."

He stared in the box for the longest time not saying anything, when he finally looked up from the box his eyes were watery, his voice was shaking as he whispered, "Twins." He pulled me into him and kissed me with such passion I felt like I was soaring above the earth.

His hand ran down my back then slid around and rested on my stomach, whispering, "Thank you," into my ear.

From there he picked me up and carried me up the stairs and into our room. He was so gentle with me as he slowly undressed me kissing each new spot of skin that was revealed. This is what love is all about. Showing it to where the other person has no doubts about that love.

He laid me on the bed then striped off his clothes, before joining me. The kisses started all over again. I wanted and needed him inside me, but at the same time I relished each and every touch and kiss he is gave me.

When he finely settled between my legs after teasing me making me so hot and wet he slid in and I feel like I was falling over the edge, he told me not to come yet. He's thrusts are slow and deep our eyes are locked onto each other. There could be no doubt the depth of his love for me. When he finally tells me to let go I do screaming his name, followed by him calling out mine.

He rolls to the side and pulls me tight against him. He tells me just how much he loves me and that tonight was perfect as is every night with me.


	6. Epilogue part 2

Epilogue part 2

Jasper's POV

Five years after last Epilogue

I lie here watching my sweet Bella sleep. Even after all these years I can't believe how fortunate I am to have her love. To think I almost blew it all by not keeping in contact with her dad. Charlie understood how I felt about her as far back as I can remember. He made me promise I wouldn't act on my feelings for her until she was an adult and ready to start life as my wife.

I watched her grow up from a far, most of it through contact with Charlie or stories I heard from my family. It still hurts to find out they felt my sweet sweet wife was a burden to them and it was all just out of pity that they acted as if they loved her like family.

I have a better family without them. Bella has given me six wonderful children, three beautiful daughters, and three boys, each of them are so different, even the middle ones being twins, fraternal look and act so differently.

I wouldn't change anything in my life. I have a wonderful beautiful wife, my job is my dream job, and the only thing that is missing is I thought I would start out as a deputy to Charlie not taking over for him because of his death.

I wish with all my heart he was around to see and watch all his grandkids grow. That is the only part of not having my family apart of our lives is the fact our kids have no grandparents. At least they have Peter and Charlotte to fill in the spot as uncle and aunt.

I was so glad when Peter and Char moved out here five years ago, our kids are growing up together, and it's such a joy to watch them interact.

When Bella told me she was pregnant with the twins her biggest fear was losing the house she grew up in, but I told her I would rather add onto the house then buy something else. I know this is what Charlie would have wanted us to do.

With the house being on two acres of land adding to it was no trouble at all. Within days of finding out the twins were on the way I called a contractor and started the work on extending the house. We added four more bedrooms, as well as a kids' playroom, an office/library, and a few extra bathrooms.

Our bedroom we added a master bath, we had made on the first floor; we also added a bath off the kids' playroom to make it easier for the kids. I also had the kitchen redone, putting in professional style appliances. We also added a second bath upstairs, so the kids wouldn't have to share so much as they got older.

Life is good and I won't change a thing. Bella has always planned our anniversary, but this year I wanted to do it and so when she wakes up tomorrow I'll be telling her that the kids are going to spend a week with Peter and Char and I'm taking her on a trip to Hawaii. She'd mentioned a few years back that she'd always dreamed of going there, so we will spend a week there just the two of us then Peter and Char will be joining us with all the kids. I asked them over and over if they felt they could travel with all the kids. I mean three teenagers, and then six kids under the age of ten, that can't be easy. They both have told me it shouldn't be any problems.

Thinking about seeing my wife in her swimsuit has caused me to get hard I'm so tempted to wake her up and show her what she does to me. I pulled Bella closer to me making sure my erection was touching the side of her thigh; I hoped that she would stir and feel what she does to me and will want to help me out with this.

I finally started to drift off to sleep when I felt Bella roll over onto her side and she wiggled her sweet ass on my still harden cock, she released a little moan. I found myself leaning over and whispering into her ear, "Feel what you do to me?"

Her answer was another moan and more wiggling, so I ran my tongue over her outer ear then down her neck. I felt her breathing change, yup she was a wake.

"Baby… I need… you," she says in between moans as she rubs herself on my cock.

That was all I needed to know as I slid her silky panties to the side with one hand while the other is moving my sleep pants down just enough to let myself loose, and then I slid right into where I so wanted, needed to be. My strokes were slow and deep as I kissed down her neck and back up to her ear, taking it in and gently sucking on it. Her skin taste like the cocoa butter she puts on each night after her shower, which I always help to make sure her whole back is done.

Each time I stroke inward I get a moan and a soft, "yah right there… feels so good."

There is nothing better in life then being inside my wife, to me this is heaven and a place I'll always want to be, as well as enjoy being. She was made just for me, I feel a connection to her, and that connection is only intensified when we make love.

"I love you so much my sweet darlin'," I say softly into her ear.

This was about making love, so I kept the slow deep strokes up. I could feel the slow build up in my balls as they tightened. I stopped moving leaving myself buried deep inside her, just held her telling her how much I loved everything about her, I told her how beautiful she was to me. This got a little giggle out of her, which caused her sex to contract around my cock.

"You are the most beautiful woman I've ever known, your beauty radiates from deep within. I thank God each day that you're mine," I say.

I slowly withdraw all the way, causing her to grown and say, "Put it back inside me I need to feel you inside."

I roll her over onto her back rolling her silk nightgown up; she lifts up so I can pull it off. I then slowly take off her matching panties kissing down her legs. Once I had her, fully naked in front of me I slid my sleep pants down and kicked them off.

"Darlin' you are beautiful inside and out, now no more giggling and let me show you just how beautiful you are to me," I said as I kissed up her the inside of her right leg.

I licked up her slit, putting just a tad bit pressure on her little button, which was hard and poking out of it's skin, then I licked up her belly to her breast, first taking in her left one, while my fingers rolled her nipple of her right between them.

She moaned and pushed upwards into my mouth. I know how to play her body and get the responses I want from it. I then switched breast and did the same thing, before kissing up to capture her mouth with mine.

As our kiss deepened I slowing entered her again, she wrapped her legs around my waist, so she could rise her hips up and meet each thrust. It didn't take long for my balls start to ache again with release, as I swelled inside her sex it tightened around me as she came, pushing me over the edge. I pushed deeper into her as I shot out my sperm, part of me wished I hadn't let her talk me into letting her have her tubs tied after Aaron was born two years ago.

I rolled to the side and pulled her tight against me. Kissed her once more before telling her, how much I love her. We both drifted off to sleep.

I woke a few hours later to an empty bed and giggling children coming from the other room. I looked at the clock on the bedside table and it showed that it was eight. I never sleep this late, guess showing my wife how much she means to me took a little more out of me than normal. I got up grabbed my sleep pants, and a fresh t-shirt from the drawer before walking out into the hall and down to the living room where I saw Aaron and Caleb sitting in front of the TV watching some Disney movie. I could hear the other kids laughing from the kitchen. As I walked into the kitchen, Rebecca and Rachel attacked me, each of them grabbing hold of a leg and sitting down on my foot.

Bella was finish-up putting pancakes and sausage onto the table with JW getting out the Orange juice from the refrigerator. Bella didn't even seem to realize I was there until Rachel said, "Walk daddy I want a ride." This caused her to turn and smile at me; she mouthed she loved me then turned to as Nat if she would get her little brothers ready for breakfast.

At six, she looks more and more like her mom each year, she even has her mom's soul. In fact, each of the kids seems to have more of her soft, kind soul than mine, which I'm thankful for.

I walked over to the table carefully lifting my legs to give the twins a ride they wanted, this brought giggles with each step I took. At four years old they are the ones who keep, us the busiest not even Aaron and Caleb are into everything like these two are.

I know Bella is busy with the kids and has stopped teaching full time to be at home with them, but then again our last four are so close in age. I understand why she wants to be home with them, Caleb joined the family just eleven months after the twins followed by Aaron just ten months after that making them four, three and two years of age.

We had just finished up with breakfast when Peter and Char came in; not even knocking on the front door, "Are the kids ready?" Peter said.

"What are you talking about?" Bella questioned.

Peter and Char looked at each other then at me.

"Darlin' I wanted to tell you last night, and then again this morning when we…," Seeing Bella blush made me stop talking and before I could finish what I had started to say Bella asked me what's going on.

"Sweetheart, we are going to leave this evening for Hawaii for a week, and then Peter, Char and all the kids will join us there for another week."

"What, How, Why?" was her reply.

"Sweet heart, Darlin', You've said many times you dream of going there, and I felt it was time I took my wife on a honeymoon, those the week alone," Bella started crying so I wrapped her in my arms, held her tight to me as one hand moved up and down her back soothing her.

Once she was all cried out she looked up at me and said thank you, Then us four adults worked to get the kids all packed, give Peter a key to get back in if they needed anything else before joining us in Hawaii.

Bella and I spent the rest of the morning making love before we drove to the airport for our flight. It would be our first vacation since we've been married without kids, we've always gone camping for a few days each summer or take day trips to do something fun, this was something different and hopefully it would be relaxing.

I was tired and ready to just crawl into our bed at the hotel, but I guess that wasn't to be as when we walked in there standing at the front desk checking in was not just my parents, but also Carlisle and Esme Cullen. I started to turn and walk back out, willing to find another place to stay. Bella pulled on my arm, saying, "We can't let them ruin this for us and we can't hide from them either. We need to face this head on. Yes, it still hurt, but I've got you and our kids. I've got more love in my life than I ever dreamed I would have after losing Charlie." She kissed me and then started walking towards the front desk.

We stood in line behind them and waited not saying anything, but prepaid for any comment they made once they realized whom we are and I know they will know who we are since I'm a carbon copy of my dad.

As they turned after receiving their key cards, they saw us.

"My God son, you're still with that bitch I told you to leave her years ago."

"Son I agree with your mother on this one she's not the right woman for you, she's just a needy bitch. I wanted better for you."

"I can't believe that it took you all seventeen years to push me out of your life, why not earlier if I was such a burden on you. I've never done anything to any of you. You are the one who welcomed me warmly. You're the ones who taught me how to love again after my mom abandoned me. At least your son stood by me and showed me how to love again after you all abandoned me when I needed you most. You all can go to Hell," Bella said, then turned, pulling me along with her.

I turned back to see looks of disbeliefs on each of their faces. I was so proud of Bella for standing up for herself. Once outside I pulled her into my arms and kissed her, where my parents and the Cullens could see. I wasn't ashamed of my feelings for her and I gladly showed the world how she makes me feel.

Kissing her made me hard and I wanted to now take her up to our room and make love to her, but she had other plans as she backed out of my arms took my hand and pulled me down the side walk. We walked down to the beach and walked the shoreline hand in hand.

After a few minutes of just walking I stopped turned towards Bella, who was just so radiant in the moonlight. If I wasn't already so deeply in love with her I would have fallen in love with her right then and there.

I smiled, gave her a wink just before pulling her to me, I ran the back of my hand over her cheek. "I love you so much; this is supposed to be our honeymoon. Do you want to go somewhere else or stay here?"

"We're staying right here, they can't hurt me any more. You've shown me what true love is, as well as the true meaning of family."

Her eyes were sparkling with something I couldn't really tell. She stood on her tiptoes, kissed my nose, then started pulling off her clothes, before turning and running into the ocean. I just stood there dumbfounded for the longest time just staring at my beautiful wife playing in the waves with only the light of the full moon shining down on us.

"Jasper aren't you going to join me?" she asked.

It took me no time to strip my own clothes off and join her in the water for a moonlight swim, which turned out to be much more than just a swim. We made love on the waters edge before dressing and heading towards our hotel to check in.

We made love again in the shower getting all the sand off us, then fell into bed sated. I fell asleep wrapped around the love of my life and knowing nothing except death would tear us apart.


End file.
